Posted in Humor, Life, Rumblings

I am too old for this Sh*t

I still remember the day when the favourite pastime of the fairer sex, was visiting the salons.

The ladies used to spend hours and thousands to look young.

The amount of makeup it took to make a 40 year old look like a 20 year old was astonishing. Personally, I am not against beauty, but I hate the idea of looking something which you are not. It is unnatural.

Well, times have changed.

I just found the internet full of people posting pictures of an old version of themselves.

Is this progress ?

Definitely.

This is the first step for Nirvana — Acceptance of the truth.

Or maybe, as Roger Murtaugh says, I am too old for this Sh*t.

I can’t understand how a 40 year old, wears makeup to look like a 20 year old, who then uses an app to look how she will look like a 40 year old, 60 year old and 80 year old.

You don’t need an app for this, just a bucket of water.

Posted in Life, Rumblings

Slumber uncertainity

The human instintcs of Trust and Distrust are so easy to be descibed in a single situation. A situation as simple as sleep, can help as an example. A real life example.

A friend of mine has a hard time to wake up in the morning, even harder to get out of the bed and go to work.

People can be so distrustful when it comes to sleep. We have a driver who picks us up every morning. Now, it so happens that the driver is so untrusting that he will call my friend 30 mins prior to the pickup time. It was all good, till he realized that my friend received the call and yet after the call, went back to sleep. This happened a few times and the driver soon realised how unfruitful it was.

Our driver is a smart guy. He now asks for a photograph which can show a reflection of my friend in the bathroom mirror, brush in the mouth and will not disconnec the call before he gets such a photo.

This is what I call dedication to work and helps my friend be on time at his office.

Posted in Rumblings

Keep Stress at bay

 

We all get those annoying emails from insurance companies.

They claim that we can keep the Stress and Worry at bay for just Rs. 12/-

That’s the cost of 1 cigarette.

So, the message to all is, since the world is overcrowded, the best way to to avail this offer is to apply it in our lives.

A cigarette a day might just help you make friends with your local doctor. This will create more employment opportunities in the tobacco industry as well as reduce your “stress” level from all the nocotine induced euphoria.

So, instead that insurance, go for the pack of cigarettes. Who cares about your loved ones.

Posted in Rumblings

The Crush…

For all these years all the guys and gals that I had met and talked with, all they have these encounters fresh in their memories… these are the encounters that they always talk about with the same amount of enthusiasm, as they would have on the day one itself! These encounters I am the ones that they would never forget, even till they leave this planet for a better place… So special and warm are these encounters … and you might be thinking what these encounters …actually are?
These encounters are nothing else but, the memories of their first crush!! (And yeah this has nothing to do with the film from 1993…)

It all started with some subject or an object or a location that one might be looking at and then out of blue, without any warning, all those memories start gushing through the mind like a flash flood, filling up all the each and every corner with emotions… to such an extent that eyes show the effect intensity to the crush’s memory!

The first sighting of the one, and you fall heads over heels for that one! The first sight, that face, that hair, that smile, and that time of the day… Some even tend to remember, the direction of the sun, the speed of the wind (that too in nautical miles)… I bet some might have even memorized the star map! And then lost in that world of fantasy… most of the times an external jolt is needed to snap back to reality…

The first time our crush is seen, the game begins to get noticed or to notice the crush. During the college days, just to get a glimpse of our crush, we get up early and get dressed and head to the bus stop, just to travel alongside with our crush. Then even when we do not have any classes during crush classes, we will sit or loiter around the campus just to get that small peek of our crush…
And if you are lucky and if the crush lives nearby, then you would find a hundred reasons just to pass by crush’s home. You would also agree to do all those chores (there would be times you would ask your mother for any chores to take care off…) that you do not like, so that you can pass by crush home and get a peek, if they are in the lobby or on the balcony or all these antics just to get noticed…

When our crush does notice us, the first “Hi” is always the difficult ones… the butterflies that we feel, the words that are there at the tip of the tongue but, it gets difficult to speak those words, the building pressure of NOT blurting out something non-sense, which might put off our crush and the mounting pressure of blowing up this only once in a lifetime chance to talk to the crush… It feels as if after this there will be no tomorrow and you will be alone for the rest of your life… thus you get that the first “Hi” which gets stamped in our memory forever…
And every time we recall it, it’s like we go through all those emotions once again, the same feeling that same magic… and sometimes the same pressure as well… no wonder…

And with the passage of time and some external efforts from our friends, we start to converse with our crush, which had been a dream about, and oh boy! Well, the first “Hi…” does feel like a long-awaited conversation though. The feeling is like, an out of the world experience… the talk, the walk together towards our homes, the wait for each other at the bus stops, the catching and reserving seats in for each other… all these things happening without uttering a single word… and the time seems to be flying with twice the speed when we are with our crush, all the feelings are magical, something that just out of a Bollywood romance movie…

But, the happiness is short lived and before you could take any of those imaginary actions, crush bounds to depart away from us… the reasons could be anything, maybe a change in the city, maybe a new job opportunity, maybe family moving away… and even marriage… how heart-wrenching!! Whatever it could be, we just stand there witnessing that our crush is moving away from us, far away, never to be seen… all that remains, are the one-sided memories and the pain of departure and things that you could have accomplished, if and only if, you two would have been together for the rest of your lives…

With pain your heart and confusion in your mind, you accept it, ALAS! A crush will always remain a crush no matter what…

Posted in Rumblings

Time machine…

Ever wondered if we had a time machine? What could have been its implications on the history as we know it? Yes, there has been a lot of discussion in a lot of literature already… but, what if?

It is a technological concept which has always intrigued me… It is something that has always caught my imagination! It makes me think about a lot of possibilities and even a lot more events that one individual, could have an impact on…

Having such a machine would be no less than having a superpower of some sort. One can always go back in time for, a few minutes, a few days or even years and change that one particular event… That one particular nagging thing or that one mistake or an history in its entirety? It’s just endless things which could be accomplished, it’s as vast as one’s imagination could get…

With such a super-power and is almost God like ability, what are the events that one would be motivated to modify? Could it be moving to the future and getting the future tech here to get a head start? Or moving to the past and altering that one event, which will have an impact on the history of the entire planet? Or what if a person is motivated by personal motives and greed, and then move back in the past or in the future, just for his personal gains and in turn changing the entire timeline of the world as we know it? It’s just a matter of, who gets his hands on the machine first?

The last thing that remains, who knows? If the time travelers or time agents are already within us… Making those minute adjustments to the timelines as it suits their own future may be? Would these adjustments be same as we make them on our timekeeping devices? a little minute here, an hour there?

Who knows, how many times the history might have changed, changing the future along with it?

Who knows, when you get nightmares, they are because of the minute adjustments already made by the time agents? Or its just because you have entered a new timeline of your own… Who knows…?