Posted in Life

Knock knock…

Is it just me ? or does everyone stand in front of the glass doors , hoping that it will open automatically?

I visited a client recently and he had a set of doors placed consecutively in a passageway.

Both of them were made of glass obviously. When I approached the innermost door, it opened automatically, so then I proceeded to the next one.

Imagine my surprise when the door did not open. It took me a whole of 2 minutes to realize that I had to push the door.The embarrassment was compounded by the fact that a cute lady was looking at me, bemused by my predicament.

All I could do was to give her a sheepish grin, pull the door a few times and then push it, even though the words”PUSH” were written in capital and bold letters.

Technology makes us lazy and ignorant.

Posted in anecdote

Mall visits… Part 1

Visiting a mall is extremely entertaining. There are thousands of people around, which means there are a thousand different opportunities to observe human behavior and quirks.

In one such visit recently, I came across once such incident. Now, I am not very good at any language other than English and my native, but actions speak louder than words. So all this is my take on the events.

The testy Father:

There was a big family, 5 kids, their Dad and their mothers- who had come for shopping and were now hungry.

The dad was ordering a pizza for the entire family. He stood in the queue, waiting for his turn. His son, looked about 10 year old, came and stood next to him. He check if his father was paying attention to him. He was safe. His father was busy selecting which pizza would be best. He looked around. There was a hugh pile of pizza delivery  boxes, neatly staked, on the counter. He pushed them. the tower of boxes did not come down, but the deed was noticed by the Dad. He got irritated and asked the kid to stop doing that. Dad went back to contemplating how he can feed his litter. The moment the dad looked away, the child, with a sheepish smile, touched the boxes again twice, just to show his defiance. Dad noticed that and now ordered him to go sit with the rest of the family. The kid, touched the pile, one last time and ran to him mother.

Now, by the time this happened, Dad has reached the front of the queue and placing an order. The sales assistant was trying to communicate in gestures and English (which is not native here), that it was Tuesday and he gets a free pizza with every pizza he orders, but dad was having a hard time to understand that. In all this commotion, his other son, who looked 15 year old, came and asked him for some money to eat the pancakes from the next stall.

The Dad give him a look that would have melted the Himalayas faster than the global warming. The Boy was unperturbed. The dad, shaking his head, put his had into his pocket and game him a tenner. By now he looked very irritated. He must be thinking:

Here I am, trying to buy these guys a pizza, where this red Tshirt guy is trying to tell be that I can order less because he is happy to give a free pizza, God knows why. My son is asking money to by pancakes when he is going to have pizza in a few minutes. He will say that he doesn’t want a pizza now because he is not hungry now. And to think only yesterday he demanded that he wanted to eat Pizza tomorrow, no matter what. My other kid is trying to cause me embarrassment by causing havoc when he manages to topple the tower of boxes, the baby keeps crying and the two girls keep roaming around like they own the place.  God help me !

Posted in Humor

Viruses, Viruses everywhere

It is that time of the year when your throat starts to pain a bit, your activities and movement speed slow down, the nose becomes itchy and you start feeling as if you are Shiva, the Hindu God which brought a river into the world to take care of a drought, from his head. Although in this case, you will be bringing a river into this world via your nose.

Go to a doctor, and he will say; ” It is a viral infection. You will be alright in a few days.”

I think the doctors will term anything as “viral” if they don’t yet know what caused the infection.

Now I am an IT guy. What I don’t understand is, why people don’t believe us when we say that the reason their computer slowed down is because of a virus. Isn’t it basically the same thing happening to a computer ?

Posted in Humor

Keys… to flying

Have you ever wondered if the pilots on the airplane need to insert keys to start a plane ?

I have often thought about it. I always imagine that the pilot will always have to insert the key into the ignition and twist it to the right side to start the plane’s engines.

That makes me wonder, what would happen if the pilot forgot his keys at home ? Is that why we get the “technical issues” when we board the flight ?

The pilot might be saying , ” Oh crap. I left the keys in my other pants. Well, can’t really tell the passengers this, can we . Let’s just say we have a technical issue and in the meantime, send a steward to the tower to pickup the spare keys.”

Posted in Humor, Short Story

Life is sacred…a satire

She was sitting at the hospital, looking at her stomach, gently moving her hand over it.

While doing so, she kept going back to her trip to Africa. She cursed the day she entered that place.

She never thought, that her one decision would cause her this much pain. But she knew she had no choice.

She had to get rid of the life inside of her. She did not want it.

“The doctor will see you now”, said the nurse.

She went in the doctor’s cabin. Dread was upon her like a large and heavy blanket on a kid’s chest. This decision weighing heavily on her.

The doctor  had a file in front of him. Eyes peering into a bunch of papers. His eyes kept looking at the papers while his mouth said,”We can kill it without the surgery. I will subscribe some medicines for you. We should be rid of it in no time. It is still in its primary stage”.

This was excellent news for her. Joy spread across her face.

She would finally get rid of the growth in her stomach. The parasite living inside of her.

The Tapeworm.